I’ve missed work again today.
I had a breakdown this morning, sobbing at the breakfast table.
Feeling utterly overwhelmed
Wounds of the past, festering
Being brought back to the past
Preparing for Chinese New Year dishes for offerings and reunion meals
I hear my mother’s taunts of my incompetence as I tried my best to do her bidding in the kitchen.
“Not like that, you’re not slicing garlic right!”
“Make sure you don’t burn the garlic!”
“Turn the fire down!”
How I’ve buried all these hurt
It’s festering now, pulling me down
Old wounds bleeding fresh again
Paralysing me, more tears
I missed work again
I feel defeated, a failure
My mother was right, “You never do things right!”